How do you cope with disappointment?

We are all different and cope with disappointment in different ways and if we are honest, we all face disappointment at times in our lives, such as:

> The ‘A’ grade student who gains a ‘B’ in their exam may feel that they could have done better and they start to chastise themselves. 

The author who slaves away over a manuscript, only to face rejection after rejection from publishers.

The couple who are desperate to have a baby, IVF has failed several times and they have been told that there is no hope.

I try not to ever give up, to always have hope and to remain positive, but it only takes one piece of straw to break the camel’s back.

I waited for three years on the transplant list for a new kidney.  During that time, I was called four times, only to be stood down and faced extreme disappointment.  Eventually, on my fifth call, the operation went ahead and I was given a kidney from someone that had just died.  I had the joy of that situation, but in the same event, a family suffered great disappointment, heartache and loss.  That was nearly three years ago and on 23rd February I will once again celebrate my kidney-versary.

My latest disappointment is to hear today, that my shoulder surgery has been cancelled (again) for tomorrow.  This is the fourth cancellation in 18 months and I’ll be honest, it hit me hard.  It left me feeling flat and deflated, with the wind knocked out of my sails.  I felt my black dog (depression) snap at my ankles, as the dark clouds once again descended over me.  Can you grasp where I was at?

The title of this blog is ‘How Do You Cope with Disappointment?’  In the case of my latest disappointment, I could easily have allowed it to consume me, to rob me of my life and my creativity.  Instead, after a few hours of behaving like Eeyore, I wrote about it.  I wrote this blog and I shared my struggle and pain, I talked to you now reading this and I felt the joy creep back into my heart, albeit very slowly.

You may be facing your own disappointment right now and struggling with your own giants.  I know that it’s hard and that you may feel abandoned, rejected, hurt, in pain, at a loss, grieving, confused, angry, the list goes on and on.  If you are struggling, you don’t have to do it alone.  YOU ARE NOT ALONE.  Talk to a friend, a relative, a colleague, someone that you can trust or do as I do, write it down, share it and move on.

On my podcast, I’ve been chatting to various Christians who have struggled with brokenness, but found peace and comfort in being creative.  It has help them all in so many ways.  So, what is the best way to handle disappointment?  For me, it’s talk about it and create.  What about you?  I’d love to know.


Brendan is a creative Christian; a digital marketeer, podcaster, film producer, poet, and author of 8 books, including 'The book of PSALMS in Rhyme.'  He lives in Stroud Gloucestershire.  There are 'self-made men' and 'God-made men', Brendan is the latter.  An associate speaker with Christian Vision for Men.  A member of the Association of Christian Writers and Evangelical Alliance.

Click here to visit Brendan's website

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